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Monday 4 February 2019

A few years ago a few of us wote about Malevolent Slugs taking over a garden.

K. Langer is a slug, with a wig. So is Harry a  Mutant Slug who can project his thoughts. Both of them are mind readers and strangly so is Hedda Hoppa and Hedda is a frog....occasional players pop up now an then, like Fly on the Wall...Most of this is in a Cork Accent...Like. Thoughts are in Italics....

Chapter 14.
Lies. Lies. Sluggary Duggary.

Quay Langer was lounging nearby and now straightened his wig and slithered into view, slimy, and puffin': he was well out of condition.

Nor fit ar all. Boy. He thought....

Well out of condition. Disgrace. Harry added. Will you tell this Harridan what I tell you to say.

Yes. Boss. You sent for me. Like.....” He said out loud.
And this time keep your thoughts to yourself. Toe the line, Don't rock the boat. Stums the word.

Jese Boss- don't have a boat. Langer thought and strangely Hedda understood all the exchange.

Now that's a turn up for the book, she thought. Must be all this clean living.

Who's a Harridan? She shouted the thought it as well. Blank stares from the two World Leaders. Still trouble at the transmitter? Good.

Now. The Boss Like, Wants me ta Tell Ya, Like. Dat He Wants to Clean up de Garden. And Like. Wants to bring in Help ta Do It Like. He Says t'wil be T'Riffic when he's finished. A great Place ta Live.”

For Slugs. That is....ha ha ha. Both slugs thought at the same time.

Thought so. Hedda thought but not in italics. Knew you boys were up to something.

We Don't Like...wants to take over the place or an-tin. Klanger thought. To a scream of Guarded Thoughts from Harry. Keep with the message.

Twil All be. Like. Peaceful. A Peaceful Place .To Live, Work and Play. Like.....”

Yea! Yea! Hedda knew he was lying, lying through the teeth he hadn't got. Both of them in fact were lying. One lying by omission, the other by submission. Well Klanger was relaying Harry's propaganda and Harry wasn't telling the whole story at all. Her journalistic instincts told her these facts, in fact, were not factual facts, at all, in fact.

Exhausted she looked around for sustenance and spied a fly. She was about to strike when the fly cried out. “Hey! Ya can't eat me! I'm the observer to all this documentary history. Ya can't eat me! I'm the fly on the wall, that sees and hears everything!”

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